My most sincere apologies for not submitting a blog entry for last week. This was partly because I was busy on the weekend (which is when I normally sit down and ‘blog’) but also because there was very little of note to write about. But this week has been quite the reverse.
I write this on a Wednesday. I am up in London for the week, mainly on a ‘jolly’ (as my agent, Laura, called it yesterday) – although I did/do have some business-related meetings scheduled.
I arrived on Monday and spent most of that day shopping. I bought a coat, which I am told is technically called a ‘blouson’. Someone said yesterday I looked like something out of Miami Vice. I’ve never watched that show (too young!): was that a compliment? Maybe its best I don’t know. The afternoon was spent reading my book whilst sitting on a deck chair in St James’s Park. It was jolly nice indeed.
After a relatively calm day on Monday, Tuesday was quite the opposite. I had been asked to pop along to Western House, home of BBC Radio 2, to do a piece for BBC Scotland, from the contribution studios. In said studios, there is a book on the wall that has a plaque above it that reads the following: ‘We ask contributors to sign this book which we will auction for Children in Need [a UK Charity] at the end of the year’. I felt I should do my bit for charity and proceeded to sign… just under Kylie Minogue’s autograph! Previous entries included the actor Simon Callow (yes, the one I sat next to a few weeks ago in Oxford) and the writer Lynne Truss. Whoever wins the book in the auction is going to feel cheated when they read my name. They’ll wonder who I am. But one day it’ll be worth something… perhaps… maybe… I hope so.
After speaking to Scotland (about whether we rely too much on mobile phones) I then went to kill an hour walking around the National Gallery. As I tweeted on the day, there are some lovely frames there. After that, I walked down Whitehall to Smith Square, where I had a meeting. As I walked past Number 10 Downing Street, the gates opened for a delivery truck to get through. My mind wondered and I began to ask myself what would happen if I suddenly ran through the open gates up to the main door, whether I’d get shot. In America, I think it would almost be a definite (I now feel like I am an expert in American politics having watched so much of ‘The West Wing’!)
After I came out of my meeting I had a call from my agent (@laurajgraham) to say that Big Brother’s Little Brother wanted me to film a piece with them. After many calls between me, the researcher, the producer, Laura, and the travel supervisor, we set it all up for Wednesday.
Then, as that was all being sorted, I had another call from Laura saying the Scottish Daily Record wanted to get a quote or two from me, so I dealt with that before heading off to Highbury to meet a friend (@steve_charles) for dinner and then to watch him perform at a stand-up comedy night.
I shall share with you now what is possibly going to be my best story for quite some time. Sadly, the London Underground was playing up and so Steve was late and so we went and bought some sandwiches from Tesco Express. There was no convenient park bench nearby (no park, either) so we perched ourselves on a low wall just outside the supermarket (who says I don’t slum it from time to time?) As we were tucking into our dinner (his chicken and stuffing, mine a chicken Caesar), we noticed a magazine lying on the pavement nearby. It was a copy of Stylist. I noticed the date of the magazine – it was the most recent one. My mind whirred slightly before I exclaimed: ‘I’m in that!’ I picked it up quickly and opened to page 41 and there was my name, quoted in an article about Carla Bruni. We both found this very amusing.
Wednesday was an early start to get ready in time to set off for Elstree to film for Big Brother’s Little Brother. I’ve been lucky enough to work on the last three series of this British TV icon: love it or loathe it, it has certainly changed the British TV landscape. (For non-UK readers, this summer is the last UK series of Big Brother.) The premise for the shoot was that one of the housemates, who had been evicted the previous week, was a bit of a ‘Jack the lad’ personality; I was going to turn him into a gentleman – polish the edges, so to speak. Nathan (for that is his name) was a willing pupil and hopefully it’ll end up a nice fun, tongue-in-cheek piece (airing Friday, E4, 6.30pm).
Master and pupil: William with Nathan from Big Brother UK Series 11
That is what has happened so far in London. I’ve found two new favourite shops: Pulbrook & Gould on Sloane Street (a wonderful florist) and Thomas Goode & Co on South Audley Street (a furniture and china shop). They are the sort of shops you walk around and go ‘aaaaah’ and ‘gosh’ and ‘wow’ at most of the stock. Both worth a visit, in my opinion.
Brideshead Revitalised: Simon Callow, Key Lime Pie, and Student Dirt
Saturday, June 26th, 2010Last week’s blog came from my sick bed. I am pleased to report that this week’s comes from my balcony – it’s a balmy day here in Manchester: not particularly sunny, but humid and with little breeze. Lots of people that I have seen are in shorts; men are drinking out of cans; women have their bra straps on show. It’s that sort of a day.
But what sort of a week have I had? It started early on Monday (5.30am to be precise) when I woke up to get ready for my day-trip to Oxford. The first port of call at the most famous of University cities was a business school in the centre where I had been booked to teach two hours of interpersonal skills and business protocol. The audience was all girls of around 19-22, all with hopes of becoming Personal Assistants or secretaries – they were a receptive and willing audience (which is half the battle) and asked lots of questions – their Principal said to me at the end ‘it’s interesting to see which girls asked questions: you managed to get questions from girls I haven’t heard speak all year’.
After this, I taxied to BBC Oxford to record series 2 of my mini etiquette guides for their morning show. What happened with the first series was each day for a week I answered questions that the Oxford public had asked about a different area of etiquette. In series 1 we covered: social etiquette, business protocol, dining etiquette, letter writing, and finally international etiquette. For the new batch, which will transmit in the summer sometime (I’ll let you know), we have covered (not in this order): money/tipping etiquette, royal protocol, dining etiquette (again, as there is so much to say), social networking etiquette, and dress & appearance. It was huge fun recording these with my friends Louisa (@louhannan) and Henry. After we went round the corner to have a drink and some focaccia (Italian bread). Lou found it very funny that I pronounced it (incorrectly – I always struggle with that word) ‘foc-aysha’. Although she hardly has a leg to stand on when she once pronounced it as ‘foch-ach-ee-a’! Lou, Henry and I all had a good old gossip about lots of different things – the things I learned on Monday – scandalous some of them!
I then went to kill some time taking tea at The Randolph Hotel, and ended up with the highly respected actor Simon Callow sitting on the table next to me. He kept clearing his throat in a loud and thespian fashion, which did make me wonder whether he wanted to be noticed.
Afternoon tea at The Randolph, Oxford
The following day Louisa had Mr Callow on her show as a guest (he was in Oxford to perform in a touring play) and she commented to him that I had seen him in the hotel the following day, to which the actor replied ‘oh yes, the gentleman in the navy suit and purple tie’. Well, smugness levels soared when this was reported back to me. I’m easily pleased.
Wednesday saw the rather unpleasant task of helping two friends clean their student house. Their other housemates had deserted them, and the landlord had said they would lose their deposit if it wasn’t clean at the hand-back. Now, if only students would clean throughout the year and not leave it for an entire 9 months before thinking about wiping skirting boards, putting bleach down the loo, dusting the tops of surfaces, that sort of thing. I won’t go on about what I found (the fridge was a particular low point) but let’s just say I felt really sick by the end of the day… Although gathered myself in order to cook them dinner at my flat… not sure how I got that deal – they seemed to do remarkably well throughout all of that. Heigh ho. I did a Caesar salad (with home-made croutons!) and blueberry friands.
What else happened on Wednesday? Erm… Oh yes! The England football match. How could I forget that? I for one couldn’t wait for it to begin… I was straight in my car to the supermarket, which was nearly empty. I spent some quality time in the aisles, which was sheer bliss.
Thursday evening I was guesting on the Footie-Free Zone on BBC Radio 5 Live – which is a slot they’ve got running during this ghastly world cup where any talk of football is banned – well, with me booked there was no danger of me bringing up sport of any kind.
The highlight of Friday was seeing Matt at BBC Manchester (@mattyfwhite) to record my monthly slot on his show. June’s topic was gym etiquette. We also recorded July’s piece on social networking etiquette as I am away from the wonderful city of Manchester for the entire month. Boo hoo. Matt found a noise I made imitating gym-posers to be highly amusing and clipped it and played it several times over a song. I have uploaded the audio and you can hear it by clicking here. It made me laugh. I sound ridiculous.
My domesticity has returned – I felt it departed me over the last two weeks for various reasons. I also made this week my first key lime pie – never made one before, and I think for a first attempt I did very well. Maybe it could be a bit more limey – when I make it again I shall add one more lime.
My attempt at Key Lime Pie
It’s the weekend now, and I can smell the flat below warming up their barbecue, which is annoying me as I associate barbecues with people enjoying themselves in the sun (which is something I dislike as people get very sloppy and silly when the sun comes out in Britain). I think I’ll retire inside after posting this.
Tags: actor, afternoon tea, barbecue, BBC, blog, cleaning, consultant, cooking, diary, e, England, etiquette, ga, gym, keep fit, manchester, manners, Oxford, radio, Simon Callow, social commentator, sport, student, weather, william hanson, world cup, World Cup 2010
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